A few months ago, our team started a conversation about the role of women in church leadership. If you missed those first articles, you can catch up here:
Churches Need to Close the Women in Leadership Gap
3 Questions Church Leaders Should Be Asking About Women in Leadership
Empowering Women Leaders: An Interview with John Ortberg
By far, most of the response was encouraging. We also saw some rather unfortunate reactions, but we were prepared for that. We wanted to add a few more thoughts to this discussion from some women in leadership you may know:
- Jenni Catron is the author of The 4 Dimensions of Extraordinary Leadership. She has served on the executive leadership teams of Menlo Church in Menlo Park, CA and Cross Point Church in Nashville, TN. Prior to ministry leadership, she worked as Artist Development Director in the Christian music industry.
- Amy Anderson is a Ministry Consultant at The Unstuck Group. Amy served as the Executive Director of Weekend Services for over 12 years at Eagle Brook Church in the Twin Cities, helping the church grow from 3,000 to over 20,000.
- Jennifer Fuller is a strategic facilitator and leader who combines root cause analysis with creative brainstorming and coaching concepts to prepare organizations for their next level. While on the executive team at Eagle Brook Church, she developed and led expansion activities that enabled the church to grow from two campuses to six campuses.
Because we hope this conversation continues to expand, we decided to invite their perspectives on how women and men can lead better together in the Church. These are a few of their insights:
Acknowledge this is an awkward but important conversation.
JENNI: The conversation about women in leadership can sometimes feel so complicated that we’re reluctant to engage it. History, tradition and different theological interpretations all play into its complexity.
In our churches, we often recognize leadership gifts in girls. We ask them to lead in children’s ministry or youth ministry, but something changes as they get older. We tend to stop giving them opportunities. I believe this is a critical issue we need to be discussing in our churches.
John Maxwell says, “Leadership is influence, nothing more nothing less.” Perhaps this is a more helpful way to engage the conversation about women leaders in the church. Personally I believe leadership starts with influence, but that leadership is not only influence. It’s also the development of skills and spiritual gifts. Women have tremendous influence and gifts, and statistically they represent over half of your church. To leave their gifts idle is a great disservice to your entire congregation.
It’s important that women have a voice at the table in leadership. I believe it is possible to be respectful of different theological interpretations of the Bible while also unleashing the gifts of women.
Create ways for the men and women on your team to build healthy relationships.
AMY: Many churches have instituted policies that don’t allow men and women to be alone together. That means male and female colleagues are not able to be on a car ride together, have lunch, or socialize, like on a casual golf outing. And, the guardrails are good. We want to protect marriages and the church from moral failures.
As a result, however, it can also hurt the development of stronger, professional relationships. Those casual spaces in life are where some of the best conversations can happen, and where great ideas are often born.
To quote Jim Collins, this is a great example of the “both/and.” You need to have guardrails in place AND be intentional about creating experiences where the men and women on your teams can build their relationships.
Some ways to do this:
- Encourage three or more-person lunches on a regular basis
- Get out of the office and into a social setting (i.e. a 4-person golf scramble) to talk about and brainstorm a particular challenge the team or church is tackling.
JENNI: I’m not sure men understand that when they say, for instance, “I can’t ride in a car with you,” that this communicates to a woman that she is a problem. It can create isolation and unnecessary awkwardness or feelings of rejection.
When we create such rigid boundaries simply based upon one’s gender, I believe we limit the Kingdom work we can do together. I’m not advocating for irresponsibility. We need to use wisdom and discretion, but safety is not in the extremes.
When I worked in the marketplace as a newly married young woman, my husband and I had to make some decisions about how to protect our marriage. My job required me to work closely, even occasionally travel, with male co-workers. This situation forced us to develop personal convictions.
In the church, we too often legislate rules without dealing with heart. Beyond just creating appropriate guardrails, we should be trying to create a culture that teaches men and women to relate to each other as brothers and sisters in Christ. Jesus and Paul are our examples. They related to women as sisters, daughters or mothers in the Kingdom.
Don’t make gender such a big deal.
JENNIFER: When leaders make gender a big deal, everyone else around them will make it a big deal. When the leaders address difference in gifts over differences in gender, gender in church leadership becomes a non-issue. To do that it takes leaders that are secure, confident, and willing to defend people’s gifts (over defending gender).
Each of these women were careful to emphasize the need for grace and respect for different opinions in this discussion, especially in a space like this where so many different backgrounds are represented. We believe this topic is extremely important and hope to see it continue to receive appropriate attention.
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